For the Frill of It
by jadey36
Summary: Washday takes on a whole new meaning when Robin calls on Marian.


**Disclaimer: **Robin Hood belongs to Tiger Aspect and the BBC. No copyright infringement intended. All rights reserved.

**Author's Note: **written for hoodie prompt #5 (bonus) over on Dreamwidth/bbc_robinhood.

* * *

**For the Frill of It**

"One arrow, a kiss. Two, tongues. Three and I'll touch you up."

"And for four?" Robin asks, stringing his bow and plucking arrows from his quiver.

"A bonus kiss."

Grinning, Robin nocks his arrows, all four of them, and aims them at the pair of frilly white knickers hanging on the washing line. He had one of those bonus kisses last week and holy moly it was good.

Guy eyes the strung bow and wonders whether Robin has more fingers than everyone else does. The thought is not an unpleasant one.

"Blowing in my ear will not put me off," Robin says, squinting along the sight of the uppermost arrow. It does, though. Two arrows hit the manor house wall, one flies through the unshuttered window. The fourth, however, rips the frilly knickers from the line.

"I'm not sure that qualifies for a bonus kiss," Guy says. "Particularly as you've put quite a nasty hole in them and they've ended up on the muddy ground."

"Stop being so pernickety," Robin says, drawing another arrow from his quiver, his eye on a lacy pink camisole farther along the line.

"What's going on out here? Who's there?"

"Shit! Marian."

Marian, hair all over the place, a generous helping of creamy-skinned bosom riding atop the bodice of her white nightie, leans out her bedchamber window. "Robin, is that you?"

Guy quickly melts into the night shadows, but Robin, like a rabbit caught in a candle-flame, stays rooted to the spot.

"What are you doing?" Marian asks.

"I could ask you the same thing," Robin says. "I thought you were supposed to be out tonight doing your Night Watch...er...night watching thing...watching the night thing, thing..." he finishes lamely, remembering Guy is close by and will be able to hear every word.

"Robin, are you drunk?"

"Er...I may have had a little wine tonight."

"Where?"

"At the castle."

"What were you doing at the castle so late?" Marian tugs her nightie towards her neck, aware that Robin is not looking at her face as he's talking to her.

"Infiltrating."

Marian snorts. "Infiltrating what, the wine cellars? I'll give you infiltrating."

"Chance would be a fine thing," Guy mumbles.

Clutching her nightie, Marian leans farther out the window. "Who's that with you?"

"No one."

"Yes, there is. I heard them."

"One of the gang." _Lean out that window any farther,_ Robin thinks, _and frilly knickers won't be the only thing lying on the muddy ground._

"Which one?" Marian asks.

"The annoying one."

"Ah, Much." Marian eyes the two arrows embedded in the wall just below the windowsill and the frilly white knickers lying on the ground. "You still haven't answered my question."

"What question was that, my love?"

"Why you're shooting arrows at my underwear. It took my servant ages to wash that lot."

"I'm stealing them for the poor," Robin says, nocking another arrow and loosing it at the peg pinning the pink camisole to the line. "Yes!" he says, punching the air as the camisole plummets to the ground. "Silver arrow for Robin Hood."

"Oh, do grow up," Marian chides. "And if you wanted my underwear so badly, why didn't you just ask me for it. You know I'm always happy to help the poor folk of Nottingham any way I can."

Robin shrugs. "Where would be the fun in that?"

"You're infuriating, do you know that."

Robin grins. "So I've been told."

Marian ducks beneath her windowsill and then bobs up again, completely naked. "Here have this," she says, throwing her white nightie. "For the poor. I'll buy myself a new one tomorrow."

"Mmm," Guy says, "Marian baring all is certainly a bit of a bonus."

Robin shuffles backwards. He stamps on Guy's foot. "I'm the one meant to be getting the bonus tonight, or have you forgotten that. Do you know how long I had to practise before I could fire four arrows at once?"

"Much," Marian calls. "For you." A wheel of cheese comes flying out the window. It smacks Guy on the head. Robin sniggers.

"Thank you, Marian," Robin says. "This stealing underwear lark is quite hunger-inducing, not to mention, tiring. Talking of which, ought you to get back to bed; you'll catch your death dressed like that."

Suddenly realising her naked state, Marian bangs the shutters closed.

* * *

"Can I have my bonus now?" Robin drops the bundle of underwear onto the blanket Guy had previously laid on the ground, slides his bow off his shoulder and starts to unbuckle his quiver.

"Uh, uh." Guy shakes his head. "We had a bet and you lost. Underwear first."

Shivering, Robin undresses and picks up the white nightie. Guy shakes his head again, points at the frilly white knickers. "This had better be worth it," Robin mumbles.

"Trust me, Hood," Guy grins, "I can do four fingers just as well as you can."

The knickers are a tight fit but the hole Robin's arrow punched through them does at least give certain parts of his anatomy some breathing space.

Licking his lips, Guy starts to unfasten his leathers.

The deer, or boar, or wolf, or whatever animal it might be the two men hear suddenly crashing through the forest has Guy, leathers flapping, sprinting for the trees; but Robin, like a rabbit caught in the moon's beam, stays rooted to the spot.

"Shit! Robin," Marian exclaims, bursting through the trees and into the moonlit clearing.

"Marian," Robin squeaks, cupping his hands over the frilly white knickers, among other things.

"What on earth are you doing?" Marian asks, hands on hips, eyes on Robin's cupped hands.

"Er...would you believe testing the underwear for...er...durability...before I give them to the peasants, that is."

Guy snorts in amusement.

Marian whirls around, hand leaping for the dagger she has tucked in her trouser belt.

"It's Much," Robin says.

"Ah, the annoying one." Marian lets go the hilt of her dagger, eyes Robin suspiciously. "Tell me again why you're wearing my underwear. The truth this time."

A twig snaps. Guy saunters into the clearing. "Robin and I had a little drinking contest, at the castle. Robin lost. Hence the underwear thing. It was all just a friendly bit of fun." Guy sketches a small bow. "My lady."

"Friendly," Marian says. "Since when did you and Robin become friends? The last time you two met, you were wearing that stupid armour and Robin set you on fire."

"Still doing it," Robin says.

Marian gives him a puzzled look.

"Guy and I came to an understanding while you were out doing your Night Watch...er...watching the stars, night thing, thing..." Robin says.

Marian glares at Robin. Guy glares at Marian. Robin stares glumly at the ground. His bonus kiss is beginning to look less and less likely tonight.

"Well." Marian eyes both men sceptically. "Next time you make a wager, make sure it has nothing to do with my clothing. You happen to be wearing my favourite pair of knickers."

"My favourite too," Guy says, earning himself another glare from Marian and a kick in the shins from Robin.

"It's late and I'm tired and I'm going home to bed. I just came to give you these." Marian unslings a sack from her back, tosses it onto the blanket. "Some of my father's old underwear, for the poor."

"Any heels in there?" Guy asks, shuffling out of the reach of Robin's boot.

Robin gives Guy a daggered look.

"I'll have a shoe sort out next week," Marian says innocently. With that, she turns and starts running in the direction of Knighton Hall.

Guy notices Robin eyeing the sack. "Keep the knickers on," he says. He closes the gap between Robin and himself, slides a hand between Robin's thighs. "Now, where were we?"

"I was getting cold," Robin says, "and you were about to give me a four figure, I mean, four-fingered bonus."

"Ah, yes." Guy's eyes light up. "So I was." He slides a warm hand into the frilly white knickers.

Robin yelps.

"How's this?" Guy asks, wriggling his hips against Robin's hips.

"Perfect," Robin sighs. He has a feeling that, tonight, he is in for a rather a large remuneration. The thought is not an unpleasant one.

**The end**


End file.
